Found this, typed it up a few months ago.

10/30/14
So the other day I came to Realization that things happen. Sad things happen that nobody should ever feel. Pathetic things  happen

 What I don't understand is WHY. Why do unfortunate things happen to unfortunate people. Why did you do what you did?  Why did you say the things that you said. Why did you continue to hurt me. This girl that you "Love".

Then I Realized, You did what you did, because its what you have always done. You say what you said because you are a coward who couldn't man up to breakup with me in the first place. You kept hurting me over and over, word with word, I love you by I love you. You made me trust you. I trusted you when you said your mom called, or when you went out with friends, when there was food on the table and I wasn't the one that left it there. YOU took advantage of me, you took advantage of my trust that I gave so easily. Its pathetic what you did, I hate how it made me feel because now I can't look at you the same way as I once did. All I can see is what you did with her, when you should have been doing it with me. What once was our thing, turned into just things to do with people. You made me feel special, I did things I never did with anyone, Betos at 2 am, watching movies on nights end, marathon after Marathon of Eastbound and Down.
WHY. Do I cry over someone who doesn't deserve someone like me?
WHY. Do boys hurt girls the way this boy hurt me.

2/2/15
Today, I came across this. Something I almost forgot about, something that almost broke me down. except it didn't.
Three and a half months ago is when it ended. It ended with court. I wanted things to end with me and him and so I let it go. I let the charges drop and I forgave him but I didn't forget.
Today I am happy  and I'm single.  I don't talk to this guy anymore and I understand all of the unanswered questions that I once had.
I understand who I am and what I deserve. which isn't an abusive boyfriend. NOBODY deserves that.
Every girls deserves flowers and love letters from a guy who they fall madly in love with who happens to  live in Nebraska or Texas, Utah, or California.

Anyway.  Love who you love.

Update: esthetician school

Hey Guys.
Quick update,  I don't know where I left off but here I am typin' away.
So these past few months I've started Esthetician school at NIMA,  Started and stopped working out religiously, ( because of school starting and because of my views on working out) Got out of a... bad relationship and LEARNED from said relationship.I've been a maid of honor to my sister Crystal, who is my role model,  I turned 19 which is almost old. BTW.  I have decided that I want to go to Texas, Vegas, and anywhere my wee heart desires. I have my best friends Chelsie and Bryson who are freakin fantastic, I have my Momma, my Daddy and  my Dog Harley. This part of my life is Great.